The Power of Touch: How Partner Massage Supports Pregnancy and Postpartum

This is a guest blog by the incredible Faith Davis. Faith Davis is a Certified Prenatal, Postpartum, and Labor Massage Therapist, postpartum doula, and perinatal yoga teacher serving Colorado families for over 15 years in her practice Mountain Mama Massage.

In our modern culture, where the next quick fix is being sold to us all the time, we often forget that we have an incredible - and totally free - resource to soothe pregnancy, birth, and postpartum while enriching our connection to our partners right at the tips of our fingers.

Well… it actually IS the tips of our fingers. And our hands. And forearms. And all of our skin because massage is one way to promote oxytocin in our bodies.

As a birthing family, you may have already heard of oxytocin as the love hormone that plays a key role in promoting uterine contractions during labor and immediately post birth in supporting a sense of connection between parents and baby. 

But did you know that oxytocin also plays a role in our adult intimate relationships and creates feelings of connection? Oxytocin helps build feelings of trust, affection, and attachment and fosters a sense of security and closeness. These are all feelings that we want present in our birthing spaces and nurturing our relationships through the transition of growing a family!

Studies continue to show that couples who offer each other more affectionate touch (backrubs, handholding, hugging) tend to be happier and more satisfied in their relationships. This intimate, non-sexual touch has unique benefits. 

Evidence in a 2012 study suggests that 15 minutes of massage not only helps a person relax, but also boosts oxytocin with people reporting less pain, stress, and anxiety post massage. 

A 2015 study expands on that research, noting that oxytocin levels also increase in the person giving the massage, not just the person receiving the massage!

In a study of pre-eclamptic women in Turkey published in February 2024, twenty minutes of foot massage three times a week reduced both insomnia and anxiety. 

I would love to see more studies like this specifically on pregnancy, but imagine how powerful this gentle massage at home could be to you as a pregnant couple to support affection, connection, and happiness. 

While not everyone loves touch during labor, many love a good foot rub and shoulder rub during pregnancy and postpartum. 

You can find comprehensive guidance on safe and comforting prenatal partner massage techniques to use at home during every stage of pregnancy in my course Partner Massage Essentials for Pregnancy, but let’s get started with 3 partner massage techniques for pregnancy or postpartum that you can try right away!

1. With the pregnant person sitting comfortably on a chair or couch, the partner moves to the pregnant person’s feet. With or without lotion try squeezing the foot and then kneading your knuckles gently across the bottom of the foot. If you are using lotion you can also glide the knuckles gently up and down from the ball of the foot and the heel and make small circles over the heel.

2. With the pregnant person lying in bed on their side supported by pillows, the partner stands next to the bed or kneels on the bed and gently, but firmly, strokes on either side of the spine from shoulder to hips. Add the foot massage in this new position. 

Tip: If you haven’t perfected this side lying sleep positioning yet, check out our free Best Night’s Sleep Guide for Pregnancy where we teach you how to get the pillows into the best possible position.

3. The partner sits or stands behind the pregnant person so that the partner’s elbows are at the same height as the pregnant person's shoulders. The partner places their forearms on the neck-shoulder junction and puts gentle pressure on the floor while wiggling their forearms side to side. 

Partner tip: try sitting on the back of the couch while your partner sits on the couch or stand behind them while they sit on a birth ball.

Trying something new can feel daunting at a time when so much is already new, but as you prepare for birth or recover postpartum I challenge you to carve out 5 minutes for 3 days in a row to share a massage with your partner (give, receive, or trade) and notice the shifts in your relationship as you take this sweet time together. 

Faith Davis is a Certified Prenatal, Postpartum, and Labor Massage Therapist, postpartum doula, and perinatal yoga teacher serving Colorado families for over 15 years in her practice Mountain Mama Massage. She is also the creator of the at-home on-demand course Partner Massage Essentials for Pregnancy, an avid fan of midwives and birth centers, and an advocate for deep layers of familial and community support during this incredibly transformative and transitional time. You can find her practice on Instagram @mountainmamamassage or online at mountainmamamassage.com